“If Only”


“If Only” – Two small words – that can carry so much weight and contain so much emotion.

Two small words – full of so much pain and regret.

Two small words – most of us carry in our hearts.

Such words are so often uttered in reference to the past – to situations in our lives – to people we have known –

If Only- – ‘I had done things differently’ – ‘I’d said, or not said, that’ –   ‘I’d made more effort’ – ‘I’d gone, or not gone, there’ – I’d tried harder’ – loved more’ – taken time’.

“If Only” – words so often full of regret – filling us with a longing to be able to go back and re-write that part of our lives.

“If only” – lives in our past – it will always reside there – but how much room we allow it depends on us. We can allow those words to effect who we are now – for better or for worse.

‘If only’ and ‘regret’ live side by side – form a part of who we are – will always be a reminder of seasons we have lived through.

At worst we can allow the ‘if only’ to rule us – allow the regret of the past to dictate our present or future – or – we can choose to learn through the ‘if only’ – accept our failings – determine to guard those actions or emotions that may have resulted in that regretful action or missed opportunity.

“If only” makes us want to change the past – but the truth is that the past – is – past .

We live in the present – made up of the past – and looking to the future. I cannot change the past but I can allow the ‘if only’ to serve as a reminder to live my life with more care – with more thoughtfulness – be more conscious of those around me and take hold of opportunities that arise in my life. I recognise that there will still be those times of regret – of ‘if only’ but it’s what I chose to do with them that matters most.


I can chose to change my ‘if only’ into a ‘what if’ and step out with purpose in my life. Look to future opportunities – possibilities to enrich my life and the lives of others. Mark my life with ‘hope’ and not regret. Look forward – allowing myself to be free –

“What if” –



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